I’ve been doing some reading about Highly Sensitive People (HSP). I’ll bet that a lot of us are HSP’s. I had bought this book a couple of years ago because I knew that my son had a lot of sensitivities. I did recognize some of the traits in myself, but I put the book aside. This week I stumbled on a website and a yahoo group for HSP’s and started to read about this again. I’m reading the Elaine Aron book again, and I purchased the workbook. I found a website that asked these questions – I’m adding my answers.
Feel like something is inherently wrong with you? yes
Something others seem to know that you don’t? yes
Difficulty relating to most others? yes
Over-analyze everything as you try to understand? Oh yes!
Have a hard time turning your brain off at night to sleep? Definitely
Autoimmune disorder? Food allergies? Muscular tightness/soreness? Digestive issues? Symptoms that doctors have not been able to resolve? Not so much, luckily.
No one really understands you and you feel so alone? Yes
Yet, you desperately want real closeness and intimacy with someone? Absolutely
Feel like you NEED your relationships, even though they aren’t what you really want or would ideally CHOOSE? Exactly
Overwhelmed by your emotions? Frequently, except in my therapist’s office
Get a “buzz” from planning and thinking? Yep
Avoid anger or intense emotions in others? Not so much
Difficulty letting go and just being you? Wouldn’t even know how
Don’t know who you are at times or how to express yourself in a group? Yes
Always doing what others want or need, taking care of others while never letting others care for you? Most definitely
Putting yourself last, if at all? Sometimes
Fall in love quickly, deeply, and intensely? Can’t remember since I haven’t fallen in love lately
Want to be wanted? Need to be needed? Yeeessssss
“Too intense”, “too emotional”, “think too much”, “too sensitive”, “too demanding”, “never satisfied”, “perfectionistic”? YES!!!
Don’t know what your opinions are on the spot? Not so much
Agree to things you later realize you don’t like or want? Sometimes
Hard time saying “no”? Yes
Never seem to find a job that is really satisfying? Yep, and I never will.
Have a hard time with 9 to 5 and having someone looking over your shoulder? Oh yes!
Feel like you have a special “calling” or purpose, but aren’t sure what it is or how to fulfill it? Have radical ideas about improving life? Definitely
Highly sensitive to, allergic to, or overwhelmed by certain lighting, smells, sounds, tastes, textures? Not allergic, but sensitive to these things
Diagnosed with ADD, ADHD, Autism, Asperger’s, Anxiety, Depression, Sensory Processing Disorder, Bipolar? A few of those
Get worn out if you are “out” too much and need time totally alone to recover? Yep
Need time alone each day? Lots of it
Have a rich inner life? Too rich actually
Filled with deep thoughts and emotions that feel impossible to communicate to others? YES!
Don’t know how to relax? Always tense? Not really
Either going full force or else totally wiped out? Not so much
I would say I’m an HSP. I met someone recently, a friend of my sister’s. She is an INFP and an HSP. We met up today for shopping and lunch and it was very nice. This was the first time we’ve spent any time alone together and it was nice to get to know her. My sister thinks she is empathic to the point where she can tell what people are thinking. She also thinks this woman gets energy from dead people. I draw the line there, call me a cynic, but I don’t think dead people give off energy. Just my opinion. We had a nice time, and chatted about our Myers Briggs types and our HSPness. I didn’t reveal too much of myself of course, but if she is as empathic as my sister seems to think she is, then she can figure me out for herself!
Does anyone else think they are an HSP? I would venture a guess that many people who suffer from anxiety or depression which isn’t a result of childhood abuse or any type of trauma are HSP’s. After all if we are so sensitive to everything around us it is bound to cause anxiety. And just the fact that we feel so different from everyone else can lead to depression. Hopefully the book will tell me what to do about this.
Tags: emotion, friends, infj, myers briggs, sensitive
December 11th, 2009 at 6:35 am
Yep, that be me.
December 11th, 2009 at 2:27 pm
Yeah, that’s me, as well.
December 12th, 2009 at 3:12 pm
Oh, 200% me!
~ Grace
December 14th, 2009 at 3:00 am
Me too. But I’m also a little sceptical of categories and labels. So when I answer something like that I’m always thinking “yes, but”. I’m not sure how much it will help me to add the HSP label as well. But I’m all for being more sensitive and aware and finding skills to cope when that sensitivity is too much.